**Please note that Jaden does discuss the Scene with Bella on the Motorcycle therefore there are non-book spoilers in the video.  If you don’t want to know don’t watch! 

 Also, quite a bit of fun seeing things from a hater’s perspective (oh what a dark, friendless world that is!).  Seeing as how the two hate comments I get the most are “yous ukk” and “ur ghey”, I figured I’d make an impromptu song using…pretty much just those phrases.

Srs bsns, indeed.

The views expressed in this video are those of Jaden Nation (aka “me”) and are not necessarily shared by the owners of TwilightLexicon.com.  They are a prime example of people who do not suck.

(huff)  (puff)  Did I make it in time?  Is it not midnight yet?

When the Lexicon took me under their wing (theoretically speaking) they told me to make sure I got my video uploaded before midnight of Sunday.  They did not, however, clarify which time zone I needed to get it in by.  And then they leaned closer (with a twinkly twinkle in their eye) and said:

“If you don’t have your video up by then, you’ll be TURNED TO STONE!”  (see example below)

Brace yourselves for some scary kafuffin, guys.

NOOOOOO.  I need them!  All of them!  How can I be a writer if (as the pirates say) Stone Men Tell No Tales?

So because of these subtle hints/threats, I have spent the greater part of this Sunday trying to find Twilight stories that were Controversial or Scandalous.  And I ended up talking about Yes Man, and leaving the house and nearly getting killed at the gym (for reals…it was a dreadful embarassment).

Comments much appreciaterized.  BlogTV on Friday at blogtv.com/people/jadennation!  Lots of Oreos will be eaten and dedicated.

Jaden Nation runs a weekly satire piece, but the views and opinions expressed are those of Jaden Nation, not persay the Twilight Lexicon.

Being a natural assassin and part-time goose farmer, stealth and espionage comes more naturally to me than to your usual blogger.  Hence, I am posting my video at 1:18 AM Nation Time (thank you, OTNC), when I am certain the usual admins of this site are either A) asleep or B) doing fun things with friends.  I am unable to do either, mostly due to Dr. Mupps only giving me thirty minutes out of my cell each day.  (sigh).

Oh, and clicking on the image below will open the video in a new window.  The reason I can’t post the video again (I believe) is because I have a meager guest account which won’t let me post hyperlinks.  Could one of the mods fix this, plz?  Kthx. FIXED!…altough Sunday is actually Jaden’s day, but we love him and will let him post on Saturday since he’s a little confused. 🙂

I’m still unsure who this Caleb Newton person is supposed to be…perhaps a distant relative of my dear brother Kaleb?  I certainly hope not, as this would make me related to someone who’s last name began with a consonant, such as this apparently drug-addled fellow:

Terrifying.

Jaden Nation runs a weekly satire piece, but the views and opinions expressed are those of Jaden Nation, not persay the Twilight Lexicon.

Hello people, I’m Jaden Nation.  Due to a perfectly-executed mixture of bribery, blackmail and Becka Grapsy (the three B’s) I am now a sorely-underpaid employee of the Twilight Lexicon.  For the past couple of months I’ve been running a video blog about the New Moon movie and now the Lex offered to host my videos (in simple terms: Bailey got nothin on me).  No, just kidding.

We’re having some bizarre problems (probably aliens) with uploading this week’s vid.  So if, for example, you’re interested in getting a free sample of Robert Pattinson’s saliva on your Twilight DVD, plz click the image below to see the video.  You will be transported to a world of magic. (I have vanquished the aliens and now you can watch the video in the post, Clearly Jaden is still new around here)

Also, this video includes some Bald Content.  For anybody from my usual channel asking what happened to my previous curly golden locks of hair: this is what happened:

Stunning last-minute Photoshop magic, eh?  Note my ghostly (ghastly?) appearance and the POOF of hair protruding from the side of my head.  It’s my headhunter lock.